“Sara?
Is that you?”
I glanced up automatically before my brain
registered who it was. I quickly looked back down, but it was too late. She'd seen me.
“I thought that was you,” she said
pleasantly, closer now. It was impossible to pretend she wasn’t there.
I looked up, meeting her eyes. “Nadia.”
Her smile was just what I expected it to
be; as full as Angelina Jolie’s lips and just as fake.
“I was looking for you last night at Mark’s
house, but I didn’t see you there,” she said, her mouth turned down into a frown.
My face enflamed. “I…I was out shopping
with my sister last night.” I hated that I stuttered.
“That’s not why you weren’t there,” she
said knowingly, with that sticky sweet smile back on her face. “You
weren’t there because you weren’t invited. I think you were about the only
one.”
That smile stayed on her face as she
turned and walked away, only that time it was real.
Simply brilliant. Not more not less. You a talented. Thank you.
ReplyDelete"Ice Queen" - love the song by Within Temptation :)
ReplyDeleteI haven't heard that one; looks like I need to make another trip to the istore.
DeleteThis is so apt, and so brilliant in its brevity.
ReplyDeleteLook forward to the rest of your challenge posts!
Damyanti @Daily(w)rite
Co-host, A to Z Challenge 2013
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
AZ blogs on Social Media
Thank you, look forward to having you back.
Delete'Ice Queens' are my favorite to write. I love the conflict they create just by being. In stories, anyway.
ReplyDeleteThey are so easy to hate, aren't they?
DeleteHuh. Not the kind of 'ice queen' I'd expected. Almost the desire for warmth?
ReplyDeleteThat's usually the foundation of it.
DeleteNice scene! I love "as full as Angelina Jolie’s lips and just as fake." That's great! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by my blog. Yours seems like a lot of fun. Following! ☺
:) Good to have you aboard!
DeleteAwesome challenge, to write 26 short stories with a 150-word limit! What a great idea.
ReplyDeleteIt's been more fun than I would've thought.
DeleteOh my God. I know so many girls like this. You got this dead on!! Great job. Love this.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately so do I.
DeleteBooo!! Hisssss!!!! (throws popcorn)
ReplyDeleteWhat a witch!
The sad thing? This is entirely true. And it was with four year olds.
DeleteMy what a challenge? I wish you all the good luck.
ReplyDeleteThank you for calling by my blog , much appreciated,
Yvonne.
And thank you for visiting mine.
DeleteDon't you just want to smack people like that?
ReplyDeleteI wish I could punch such people on their nose.
ReplyDeleteNice work. :)
:)
DeleteI wish there weren't people like that in the world! Awesome characterisation though, in such a short space. :)
ReplyDeleteI loved the way you described her fake smile. There's a lot of intensity in this scene, and I felt the sting at the end.
ReplyDeletewe've all been there...
DeleteIt would've been so cool if the narrator would just tell the ice queen what she thought of her. I would like you to do a sequel scene where we see the ice queen melt!
ReplyDeleteohh..good idea. I'll have to think of something like that for M, maybe.
DeleteThere's a word for people like her.
ReplyDeleteNow, now...:)
DeleteYou are doing a fantastic job writing short stories under 150 words. I really enjoyed Ice Queen. Great emotion.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I have to admit, some of them are a smidge over 150 though. I guess when it comes to adjectives I just can't let some of them go.
DeleteOh I knew that girl!
ReplyDeleteMe, too and her name was ---.
DeleteI so badly want to type who that is but it will be found and I will be in trouble. I didn't know you had met my ..... She never mentioned it.
ReplyDelete:)
DeleteI am coming across lots of great short story writers. I am inspired! This story has high school written all over it, and unfortunately adulthood, too. Nice character development!
ReplyDeleteCheck out my A to Z! Jen Hemming and Hawing Again
Actually, sadly, this scene took place in a preschool classroom.
Deleteaw! so mean!!! Great snippet you captured there.
ReplyDeleteUrgg - I really hate the mean girls. Really well written. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteRhonda @Laugh-Quotes.com
Visiting from AtoZ #41
Cruel, cruel woman. I'd run like crazy if I saw a Nadia coming up the street.
ReplyDeleteprobably a good idea.
Delete