Today
is the first Wednesday of the month, which makes it ISWG time.
Until
you become I writer, I don’t think you realize how close a story really is to
the person who wrote it. It kind of reminds me of a patient I once had. He had a knack for getting under people’s skin; it was something he really worked hard at. He was better with some of us than others, but for some reason, his insults never hit that close to home for me. Until he hit a weak spot in a totally unexpected place.
Here’s
how the conversation went:
“Your
clothes suck- I bet it only cost you like fifty dollars for the whole outfit.”
Actually, the shirt was a
hand-me-down from my friend and the pants I got from Salvation Army, so the
number’s probably closer to $2.50. “What I wear is not
what is important here,” I answer, totally unaffected. I wear what I like, not
what’s expensive.
“And
I bet your car sucks, too. Probably still has stock everything.”
“Stock?”
I ask.
An
eye roll. “You know- from the factory.”
I
shrug, not really getting it. Let’s just say my car at the time was several
years “from the factory”. Another miss on his part.
Finally
he looks at my feet, shaking his head. “Man, those are the ugliest feet I’ve
ever seen.”
“Hey!”
I yell out before I realize the word is out of my mouth. Until that moment I didn’t
realize how sensitive I must be about my feet.
He
smiles. Bull’s eye.
Now
if he’d started off right away with “I hear you wrote something, it sucks,” he
probably would’ve gotten a much more heated reaction much earlier on. I’m so
close to what I write, it’s hard to hear stuff like that. I know I have to get
over it. As a writer, lots of people will think my work sucks, but right now I
have to admit, it still gets to me. It’s my ultimate Bull’s eye.
Since we are a part of our creations, it feels more like a personal attack, although usually it's not.
ReplyDeleteThat guy was a jerk. Someone should've put him in his place.
Feet, huh? Feet aren't really supposed to be attractive anyway, are they? ;)
ReplyDeleteYes, our writing is definitely a sensitive area. But I guess that why they say you need a thick skin. There will be people who don't like it. Just like there are tons of published books out there that we don't like. :)
Oh yeah, definitely my writing. I have difficulty showing it to people because of that - I'm terrified of people not liking it and saying something horrible! I still need to grow my thick skin :)
ReplyDeleteMy feet/toes are some of the ugliest things about me. I even have a "snaggle toe" (which, of course, my kids nick-named it). I broke it twice and now it likes to dislocate and pop out all on it's own. UGH. It's disgusting. All that having been said, I will gladly join in when someone rags on my ugly toes, but my writing? NO way. That, is sacred. And where my sense of humor tends to stop. I'm not sure why I am so hyper-sensitive to it, but I am SO guilty of this too Melanie!
ReplyDeleteThat guy is a total jerk. If he wasn't a patient there are some choice comments that could have been countered.
ReplyDeleteMy feet are an issue with me and I use to keep then hidden - It was just recently I started not being worried about my toes hanging out in the summer.
I know as a writer we have to have tough skin - I'm still working on building up my calluses.
There's a huge difference between negative criticism which may be constructive, and plain cruelty.
ReplyDeleteI suppose it takes all kinds to make this world. *sighs*
But a jerk is a jerk. That's it. To the point.
Writer In Transit
Someone insulting my writing overall I could live with. My characters specifically, it'd get under my skin. Someone insulting my family or husband.. it won't be pretty .
ReplyDeleteJust discovered your blog, and I see myself in this post. I think I have a thick skin when it comes to critiques about my writing, but I am instantly hurt and I withdraw if I think I bore someone.
ReplyDeleteNice blog.